Dually Noted is a new, all-original Above the Fold segment. Check back every Sunday for the new one.
Introduction/Anarchism
A Black Anarchist walks into a Klan meeting.
Klan Leader asks why he’s there.
Black Anarchist: “Got kicked out of my other meeting.”
Klan Leader: “Which meeting?”
Black Anarchist: “Anarchists for Diversity.”
Klan Leader: “What for?”
Black Anarchist: “Not wearing black.”
Neoliberalism/Animal Rights
The chickens in this coop refuse to cluck.
Dick Cheney walks in.
He says, “cluck, cluck.”
The chickens glance awkwardly at one another.
Dick says, “cluck, cluck.”
The chickens stare…silently…waiting.
Dick picks up a chicken and bites its head off.
The chickens cluck.
Dick walks out.
Gender Relations/Health Care
I went to the doctor
Twas burning whilst I peed
I went to the doctor
She quoted Margaret Mead:
“Man’s role is uncertain, undefined, and perhaps unnecessary.”
I’m uninsured.
The Economy/Worker’s Rights
Bankers hang…
Droop!
From the belfry
Droop!
Workers sweat…
Splash!
On tattered little rags
We call it clothing
We call it
Bankers hang…
Droop!
From the belfry
Droo–
–why don’t we all just join Credit Unions?
(grumbles from the crowd)
Evolution/Drug Policy
An ape from the future walks into a bar.
Says, “gimme some bud.”
Man behind the bar says, “You mean, a bud.”
Ape says, “What?”
Man says, “It’s 2010. Weed’s illegal, but I can sell you a Bud beer.”
Ape sighs, but still drinks the beer.
Education/Religion
The poem that should have won Calhoun County’s 2010 3rd Grade Poetry Contest:
My brother Billy
He smells
My mother and my father
I love them
My dog Sam
Is really old
God
Imperialism/Elections
#44
For poverty
For war
Blackest of the white
Fopaux?
O-Whore!
Social Change/Conclusion
The cusp of what?
Horizons never nearer
Never further
Though
So neither
It’s nothing
That humming
Horizons never clearer
Or something
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These are great!
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